The Martian, journal publié par les soldats américains de l'Hôpital de Mars-sur-Allier , item 6
Transcription
Transcription history
-
The Martian
Hommes - 36-40
Chevaux - 8
Vol. 1. - No. 12. Sunday, November 10, 1918 Price: 30 centimes
----
Column One
Impossible People
Cartoon with one soldier looking at another, with an exclamation point in a thought bubble
Caption:
The man to whom you owe your month's salary and who insists on hanging around the office door the day you are paid.
----
The Difference
No more ham and eggs and grape fruit
When the bugle sounds for chow:
No more apple pie and dumplings
For we're in the army now.
They feed us beans for breakfast
And at noon we have them too:
But at night they fill our tummies
With a good old army stew.
No more fizz or beers or highballs
When you have an awful thirst
(If you're thinking of enlisting, -
Get used to water first!)
No more shirts of silk and linen
We all wear the O.D. stuff
No more nightshirts or pajamas
For our pants are good enough.
No more feather-ticks or pillows
And we're glad to thank the Lord
That we've got a coat and blanket
When we might have just a board!
By Jinks we'll lick the Kaiser
When the coachers teach us how
But hang him, he's the reason
That we're in the army now!
J.B.K./Q.M.
Column Two
Hints to Young Officers
Immediately on being notified of your Commission, drop everything and run to the nearest cable office. A modest way of breaking the news without fear of injuring the rapid spread of the information is to word your message something like this; "Myself and another Lieutenant dined quietly at the Officers Mess last evening. Love." This is sure to cause an epidemic of telephoning in your home and make every one gurgle and say nice things. After a sufficient length of time, it is well to follow with a second cable to the effect that there are still a few photos of yourself in the third bureau drawer of the guest room. Consider the feelings of the folks at home. For newspaper reporters have a way of being very insistant.
----
Remember that nothing brands the new officer quite so much as fumbling with the buckle of a Sam Browne. Men will know that it doesn't fit without your calling attention to it by constant fussing. And if it needs hitching, do so in the privacy of your own room, but never in public.
----
Cultivate an easy and familiar manner in addressing brother officers. "Hi there!" (accompanied by a playful flip of the hand) is always good.
----
When visiting another officer, never sit in a chair but show priviledge and abandon by roosting on the corner of his desk. Every once in awhile thrust an eraser into the ink well. This will make you popular with the stenographer. Another playful diversion which will help in giving the impression of being and old timer is to make dots on the blotter until it looks like it was coming down with a bad case of measles. Every so often give your host a dig in the ribs (the same to be accompanied by whispers and sly winks). This is sure to convince the entire office force who are tip-toeing around in the shadows, that you are a "gay dog," in civil life. This impression should be kept up as long as possible. If you find it dying out, try carrying a pink envelope written in a scrawling hand and smelling of musk. With proper care one envelope will last for the period of the emergency.
----
Never knock on a door, but on the other hand don't exhibit rashness by walking deliberately into a room. A good way is to sandwich yourself between the door and the casing, give the occupants a sweeping glance and then quickly disappear without comment. After the shock of your visit is over it is quite certain that speculation will run high as to exactly what you wanted. In any event, it is safe to say your name will be the subject of conversation for the rest of the morning.
----
When going through a hall without a hat, always carry papers in the left hand with a telegraph blank showing somewhere among the folds. With proper timing it is possible to spend a whole morning going from one office to another without fear of diminishing the effect.
Column three
Ask for anyone higher than yourself and then look worried when told that he has just stepped out. Keep the "worried" expression for one horrible moment and then let your face regain a natural expression by saying "Well, I'll try to catch him later."
----
Remember that even though you may have spurned the bath tub and bicycle as separate institutions that combined they win a distinction which is almost royal. And by this we refer to the side-car. If you value a shred of your reputation you will not appear in one before you are quite sure that you will not arouse suspicion of having a convulsion. Instruct your driver to give you practice by going over rough ground at terrific speed. When he finally stops; remain seated a moment in a cloud of blue smoke. This will serve to heighten the effect and incidentally give to the new uniform an air of just having come from the dry cleaners.
----
Learn to rush. This is really of the greatest importance. Remember if you don't "rush" or look "rushed" then you will never be a success as a second Lieutenant. Acquire the habit of beginning your conversation ten steps in front of the man who is approaching and end by calling over your left shoulder as you dash by. This will take time and much practice but it is sure to gain for you the reputation of being a "live wire" and "full of pep."
----
Always emanate a strong odor of shoe polish.
----
FOOT BALL TODAY!
----
The game scheduled for this afternoon between Base Hospital 48 and the Convalescent Camp, promises to be one of the most exciting of the season. Both teams are in excellent condition and after weeks of hard training will vie for honors of the Center. The line up: is as follows:
Convalescent Camp
F. B. Bond
R. H. Eddington: Hiser
L. H. Johnson
Q. B. Bolen
L. E. Hayden : Tiller : Prophet
L. T. Soule
L. G. Tulliey
C. Tempe : Cox
R. G. Robinson : Anderson
R. T. Craddock
R. E. Rawley: Clark
Base Hospital No. 48
F. B. Lt. Wilson Armstrong
R H. Brooks
L. H. Ray Lenhardt
Q. B. Stevens; Morris
L. E. Barrett; Supple
L. T. Riedel; Willis
L. G. Buddle; McBride
C. Diffibaugh; O'Donahue
R. G. Harris; Santon
R. T. Fletcher; Jones
R. E. Campbell; Pringle
----
Recent successes at the front evidently resulted in the capture of huge quantities of raw material for the favorite ammunition of the German. Cabbage is now served to us no oftener than three times a day. Our cooks are experimenting with cabbage pies.
-
The Martian
Hommes - 36-40
Chevaux - 8
Vol. 1. - No. 12. Sunday, November 10, 1918 Price: 30 centimes
----
Column One
Impossible People
Cartoon with one soldier looking at another, with an exclamation point in a thought bubble
Caption:
The man to whom you owe your month's salary and who insists on hanging around the office door the day you are paid.
----
The Difference
No more ham and eggs and grape fruit
When the bugle sounds for chow:
No more apple pie and dumplings
For we're in the army now.
They feed us beans for breakfast
And at noon we have them too:
But at night they fill our tummies
With a good old army stew.
No more fizz or beers or highballs
When you have an awful thirst
(If you're thinking of enlisting, -
Get used to water first!)
No more shirts of silk and linen
We all wear the O.D. stuff
No more nightshirts or pajamas
For our pants are good enough.
No more feather-ticks or pillows
And we're glad to thank the Lord
That we've got a coat and blanket
When we might have just a board!
By Jinks we'll lick the Kaiser
When the coachers teach us how
But hang him, he's the reason
That we're in the army now!
J.B.K./Q.M.
Column Two
Hints to Young Officers
Immediately on being notified of your Commission, drop everything and run to the nearest cable office. A modest way of breaking the news without fear of injuring the rapid spread of the information is to word your message something like this; "Myself and another Lieutenant dined quietly at the Officers Mess last evening. Love." This is sure to cause an epidemic of telephoning in your home and make every one gurgle and say nice things. After a sufficient length of time, it is well to follow with a second cable to the effect that there are still a few photos of yourself in the third bureau drawer of the guest room. Consider the feelings of the folks at home. For newspaper reporters have a way of being very insistant.
----
Remember that nothing brands the new officer quite so much as fumbling with the buckle of a Sam Browne. Men will know that it doesn't fit without your calling attention to it by constant fussing. And if it needs hitching, do so in the privacy of your own room, but never in public.
----
Cultivate an easy and familiar manner in addressing brother officers. "Hi there!" (accompanied by a playful flip of the hand) is always good.
----
When visiting another officer, never sit in a chair but show priviledge and abandon by roosting on the corner of his desk. Every once in awhile thrust an eraser into the ink well. This will make you popular with the stenographer. Another playful diversion which will help in giving the impression of being and old timer is to make dots on the blotter until it looks like it was coming down with a bad case of measles. Every so often give your host a dig in the ribs (the same to be accompanied by whispers and sly winks). This is sure to convince the entire office force who are tip-toeing around in the shadows, that you are a "gay dog," in civil life. This impression should be kept up as long as possible. If you find it dying out, try carrying a pink envelope written in a scrawling hand and smelling of musk. With proper care one envelope will last for the period of the emergency.
----
Never knock on a door, but on the other hand don't exhibit rashness by walking deliberately into a room. A good way is to sandwich yourself between the door and the casing, give the occupants a sweeping glance and then quickly disappear without comment. After the shock of your visit is over it is quite certain that speculation will run high as to exactly what you wanted. In any event, it is safe to say your name will be the subject of conversation for the rest of the morning.
----
When going through a hall without a hat, always carry papers in the left hand with a telegraph blank showing somewhere among the folds. With proper timing it is possible to spend a whole morning going from one office to another without fear of diminishing the effect.
Column three
Ask for anyone higher than yourself and then look worried when told that he has just stepped out. Keep the "worried" expression for one horrible moment and then let your face regain a natural expression by saying "Well, I'll try to catch him later."
----
Remember that even though you may have spurned the bath tub and bicycle as separate institutions that combined they win a distinction which is almost royal. And by this we refer to the side-car. If you value a shred of your reputation you will not appear in one before you are quite sure that you will not arouse suspicion of having a convulsion. Instruct your driver to give you practice by going over rough ground at terrific speed. When he finally stops; remain seated a moment in a cloud of blue smoke. This will serve to heighten the effect and incidentally give to the new uniform an air of just having come from the dry cleaners.
----
Learn to rush. This is really of the greatest importance. Remember if you don't "rush" or look "rushed" then you will never be a success as a second Lieutenant. Acquire the habit of beginning your conversation ten steps in front of the man who is approaching and end by calling over your left shoulder as you dash by. This will take time and much practice but it is sure to gain for you the reputation of being a "live wire" and "full of pep."
----
Always emanate a strong odor of shoe polish.
----
FOOT BALL TODAY!
----
The game scheduled for this afternoon between Base Hospital 48 and the Convalescent Camp, promises to be one of the most exciting of the season. Both teams are in excellent condition and after weeks of hard training will vie for honors of the Center. The line up: is as follows:
Convalescent Camp
F. B. Bond
R. H. Eddington: Hiser
L. H. Johnson
Q. B. Bolen
L. E. Hayden : Tiller : Prophet
L. T. Soule
L. G. Tulliey
C. Tempe : Cox
R. G. Robinson : Anderson
R. T. Craddock
R. E. Rawley: Clark
Base Hospital No. 48
F. B. Lt. Wilson Armstrong
R H. Brooks
L. H. Ray Lenhardt
Q. B. Stevens; Morris
L. E. Barrett; Supple
L. T. Riedel; Willis
L. G. Buddle; McBride
C. Diffibaugh; O'Donahue
R. G. Harris; Santon
R. T. Fletcher; Jones
R. E. Campbell; Pringle
----
Recent successes at the front evidently resulted in the capture of huge quantities of raw material for the favorite ammunition of the German. Cabbage is now served to us no oftener than three times a day. Our cooks are experimenting with cabbage pies.
-
The Martian
Hommes - 36-40
Chevaux - 8
Vol. 1. - No. 12. Sunday, November 10, 1918 Price: 30 centimes
----
Column One
Impossible People
Cartoon with one soldier looking at another, with an exclamation point in a thought bubble
Caption:
The man to whom you owe your month's salary and who insists on hanging around the office door the day you are paid.
----
The Difference
No more ham and eggs and grape fruit
When the bugle sounds for chow:
No more apple pie and dumplings
For we're in the army now.
They feed us beans for breakfast
And at noon we have them too:
But at night they fill our tummies
With a good old army stew.
No more fizz or beers or highballs
When you have an awful thirst
(If you're thinking of enlisting, -
Get used to water first!)
No more shirts of silk and linen
We all wear the O.D. stuff
No more nightshirts or pajamas
For our pants are good enough.
No more feather-ticks or pillows
And we're glad to thank the Lord
That we've got a coat and blanket
When we might have just a board!
By Jinks we'll lick the Kaiser
When the coachers teach us how
But hang him, he's the reason
That we're in the army now!
J.B.K./Q.M.
Column Two
Hints to Young Officers
Immediately on being notified of your Commission, drop everything and run to the nearest cable office. A modest way of breaking the news without fear of injuring the rapid spread of the information is to word your message something like this; "Myself and another Lieutenant dined quietly at the Officers Mess last evening. Love." This is sure to cause an epidemic of telephoning in your home and make every one gurgle and say nice things. After a sufficient length of time, it is well to follow with a second cable to the effect that there are still a few photos of yourself in the third bureau drawer of the guest room. Consider the feelings of the folks at home. For newspaper reporters have a way of being very insistant.
----
Remember that nothing brands the new officer quite so much as fumbling with the buckle of a Sam Browne. Men will know that it doesn't fit without your calling attention to it by constant fussing. And if it needs hitching, do so in the privacy of your own room, but never in public.
----
Cultivate an easy and familiar manner in addressing brother officers. "Hi there!" (accompanied by a playful flip of the hand) is always good.
----
When visiting another officer, never sit in a chair but show priviledge and abandon by roosting on the corner of his desk. Every once in awhile thrust an eraser into the ink well. This will make you popular with the stenographer. Another playful diversion which will help in giving the impression of being and old timer is to make dots on the blotter until it looks like it was coming down with a bad case of measles. Every so often give your host a dig in the ribs (the same to be accompanied by whispers and sly winks). This is sure to convince the entire office force who are tip-toeing around in the shadows, that you are a "gay dog," in civil life. This impression should be kept up as long as possible. If you find it dying out, try carrying a pink envelope written in a scrawling hand and smelling of musk. With proper care one envelope will last for the period of the emergency.
----
Never knock on a door, but on the other hand don't exhibit rashness by walking deliberately into a room. A good way is to sandwich yourself between the door and the casing, give the occupants a sweeping glance and then quickly disappear without comment. After the shock of your visit is over it is quite certain that speculation will run high as to exactly what you wanted. In any event, it is safe to say your name will be the subject of conversation for the rest of the morning.
----
When going through a hall without a hat, always carry papers in the left hand with a telegraph blank showing somewhere among the folds. With proper timing it is possible to spend a whole morning going from one office to another without fear of diminishing the effect.
Column three
Ask for anyone higher than yourself and then look worried when told that he has just stepped out. Keep the "worried" expression for one horrible moment and then let your face regain a natural expression by saying "Well, I'll try to catch him later."
----
Remember that even though you may have spurned the bath tub and bicycle as separate institutions that combined they win a distinction which is almost royal. And by this we refer to the side-car. If you value a shred of your reputation you will not appear in one before you are quite sure that you will not arouse suspicion of having a convulsion. Instruct your driver to give you practice by going over rough ground at terrific speed. When he finally stops; remain seated a moment in a cloud of blue smoke. This will serve to heighten the effect and incidentally give to the new uniform an air of just having come from the dry cleaners.
----
Learn to rush. This is really of the greatest importance. Remember if you don't "rush" or look "rushed" then you will never be a success as a second Lieutenant. Acquire the habit of beginning your conversation ten steps in front of the man who is approaching and end by calling over your left shoulder as you dash by. This will take time and much practice but it is sure to gain for you the reputation of being a "live wire" and "full of pep."
----
Always emanate a strong odor of shoe polish.
----
FOOT BALL TODAY!
----
The game scheduled for this afternoon between Base Hospital 48 and the Convalescent Camp, promises to be one of the most exciting of the season. Both teams are in excellent condition and after weeks of hard training will vie for honors of the Center. The line up: is as follows:
Convalescent Camp
F. B. Bond
R. H. Eddington: Hiser
L. H. Johnson
-
The Martian
Hommes - 36-40
Chevaux - 8
Vol. 1. - No. 12. Sunday, November 10, 1918 Price: 30 centimes
----
Column One
Impossible People
Cartoon with one soldier looking at another, with an exclamation point in a thought bubble
Caption:
The man to whom you owe your month's salary and who insists on hanging around the office door the day you are paid.
----
The Difference
No more ham and eggs and grape fruit
When the bugle sounds for chow:
No more apple pie and dumplings
For we're in the army now.
They feed us beans for breakfast
And at noon we have them too:
But at night they fill our tummies
With a good old army stew.
No more fizz or beers or highballs
When you have an awful thirst
(If you're thinking of enlisting, -
Get used to water first!)
No more shirts of silk and linen
We all wear the O.D. stuff
No more nightshirts or pajamas
For our pants are good enough.
No more feather-ticks or pillows
And we're glad to thank the Lord
That we've got a coat and blanket
When we might have just a board!
By Jinks we'll lick the Kaiser
When the coachers teach us how
But hang him, he's the reason
That we're in the army now!
J.B.K./Q.M.
Column Two
Hints to Young Officers
Immediately on being notified of your Commission, drop everything and run to the nearest cable office. A modest way of breaking the news without fear of injuring the rapid spread of the information is to word your message something like this; "Myself and another Lieutenant dined quietly at the Officers Mess last evening. Love." This is sure to cause an epidemic of telephoning in your home and make every one gurgle and say nice things. After a sufficient length of time, it is well to follow with a second cable to the effect that there are still a few photos of yourself in the third bureau drawer of the guest room. Consider the feelings of the folks at home. For newspaper reporters have a way of being very insistant.
----
Remember that nothing brands the new officer quite so much as fumbling with the buckle of a Sam Browne. Men will know that it doesn't fit without your calling attention to it by constant fussing. And if it needs hitching, do so in the privacy of your own room, but never in public.
----
Cultivate an easy and familiar manner in addressing brother officers. "Hi there!" (accompanied by a playful flip of the hand) is always good.
----
When visiting another officer, never sit in a chair but show priviledge and abandon by roosting on the corner of his desk. Every once in awhile thrust an eraser into the ink well. This will make you popular with the stenographer. Another playful diversion which will help in giving the impression of being and old timer is to make dots on the blotter until it looks like it was coming down with a bad case of measles. Every so often give your host a dig in the ribs (the same to be accompanied by whispers and sly winks). This is sure to convince the entire office force who are tip-toeing around in the shadows, that you are a "gay dog," in civil life. This impression should be kept up as long as possible. If you find it dying out, try carrying a pink envelope written in a scrawling hand and smelling of musk. With proper care one envelope will last for the period of the emergency.
----
Never knock on a door, but on the other hand don't exhibit rashness by walking deliberately into a room. A good way is to sandwich yourself between the door and the casing, give the occupants a sweeping glance and then quickly disappear without comment. After the shock of your visit is over it is quite certain that speculation will run high as to exactly what you wanted. In any event, it is safe to say your name will be the subject of conversation for the rest of the morning.
----
When going through a hall without a hat, always carry papers in the left hand with a telegraph blank showing somewhere among the folds. With proper timing it is possible to spend a whole morning going from one office to another without fear of diminishing the effect.
Column three
Ask for anyone higher than yourself and then look worried when told that he has just stepped out. Keep the "worried" expression for one horrible moment and then let your face regain a natural expression by saying "Well, I'll try to catch him later."
----
Remember that even though you may
-
The Martian
Hommes - 36-40
Chevaux - 8
Vol. 1. - No. 12. Sunday, November 10, 1918 Price: 30 centimes
----
Column One
Impossible People
Cartoon with one soldier looking at another, with an exclamation point in a thought bubble
Caption:
The man to whom you owe your month's salary and who insists on hanging around the office door the day you are paid.
----
The Difference
No more ham and eggs and grape fruit
When the bugle sounds for chow:
No more apple pie and dumplings
For we're in the army now.
They feed us beans for breakfast
And at noon we have them too:
But at night they fill our tummies
With a good old army stew.
No more fizz or beers or highballs
When you have an awful thirst
(If you're thinking of enlisting, -
Get used to water first!)
No more shirts of silk and linen
We all wear the O.D. stuff
No more nightshirts or pajamas
For our pants are good enough.
No more feather-ticks or pillows
And we're glad to thank the Lord
That we've got a coat and blanket
When we might have just a board!
By Jinks we'll lick the Kaiser
When the coachers teach us how
But hang him, he's the reason
That we're in the army now!
J.B.K./Q.M.
Column Two
Hints to Young Officers
Immediately on being notified of your Commission, drop everything and run to the nearest cable office. A modest way of breaking the news without fear of injuring the rapid spread of the information is to word your message something like this; "Myself and another Lieutenant dined quietly at the Officers Mess last evening. Love." This is sure to cause an epidemic of telephoning in your home and make every one gurgle and say nice things. After a sufficient length of time, it is well to follow with a second cable to the effect that there are still a few photos of yourself in the third bureau drawer of the guest room. Consider the feelings of the folks at home. For newspaper reporters have a way of being very insistant.
----
-
The Martian
Hommes - 36-40
Chevaux - 8
Vol. 1. - No. 12. Sunday, November 10, 1918 Price: 30 centimes
----
Impossible People
Cartoon with one soldier looking at another, with an exclamation point in a thought bubble
Caption:
The man to whom you owe your month's salary and who insists on hanging around the office door the day you are paid.
----
The Difference
No more ham and eggs and grape fruit
When the bugle sounds for chow:
No more apple pie and dumplings
For we're in the army now.
They feed us beans for breakfast
And at noon we have them too:
But at night they fill our tummies
With a good old army stew.
No more fizz or beers or highballs
When you have an awful thirst
(If you're thinking of enlisting, -
Get used to water first!)
No more shirts of silk and linen
We all wear the O.D. stuff
No more nightshirts or pajamas
For our pants are good enough.
No more feather-ticks or pillows
And we're glad to thank the Lord
That we've got a coat and blanket
When we might have just a board!
By Jinks we'll lick the Kaiser
When the coachers teach us how
But hang him, he's the reason
That we're in the army now!
J.B.K./Q.M.
Column Two
Description
Save description- 46.85599792463026||3.0879743000000417||||1
Mars-sur-Allier
Location(s)
Story location Mars-sur-Allier
- ID
- 13708 / 140105
- Contributor
- Médiathèque municipale Jean Jaurès de Nevers
November 10, 1918
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